Six Witchy Weapons: A 2026 Retrospective

Season of the Witch weapons and Destiny 2 crafted oddities get a witty 2026 review, spotlighting their quirks, perks, and lasting impact.

I know, I know—2026 and you’re still reading about weapons from Season of the Witch. But trust me, these six crafted oddities deserve a proper post-mortem. Back in the day, we all scrambled through Savathûn’s Spire, hoping for red borders like they were the last slice of Dawning cake. Now, with the benefit of three years of hindsight, let’s dust off these relics and see how they really performed.

6. Eleatic Principle — The Forkless Soup Eater

If Electric Principle were a person at a banquet, it would be the guest who showed up with a beautiful Arc-engraved spoon but forgot that soup was on the menu. As a rapid-fire Arc Machine Gun, it sprints out of ammo like a caffeinated squirrel, and its perk pool is a sadistic puzzle where nothing fits. On the left, you have Eddy Current, Heating Up, Well-Rounded… all perks that whisper “I’m trying” but never actually deliver. On the right, Target Lock and Golden Tricorn are tantalizing little windows into a better life, yet the left column remains a desert of missed connections. I remember crafting one, dumping 2,000 kills on it, and still feeling like I was firing a high-speed marshmallow launcher. In 2026, it’s relegated to the Vault Museum of Failed Experiments.

5. Semiotician — The Rocket That Studied the Wrong Signs

Semiotician is the rocket launcher that read every book on damage theory and then decided to wear mismatched socks to the final exam. It’s a Strand High-Impact frame, which should mean thunderous single-shot devastation, but its perk combinations feel like they were designed by a committee that never fired a rocket. Impulse Amplifier and Field Prep are functional, sure—Field Prep on a rocket is as exciting as finding an extra napkin. Then you get Explosive Light, Bipod, and Frenzy in the right column. Decent, but when you compare it to the Bump in the Night or even a well-rolled Hothead, the Semiotician is like bringing a harmonica to a metal concert. I’d occasionally pull it out in Vanguard Ops just to hear the Bipod double-thump, but each time my fireteam would ask if I was okay. No, dear teammates, I was not okay.

4. Locus Locutus — The Stasis Ice-Pick Philosopher

Here’s where things get interesting. The Locus Locutus sniper rifle always felt to me like a frozen oracle perched atop a mountain, occasionally whispering, “Headshot that Guardian.” Its 40-zoom scope is a sweet spot that never gave me motion sickness, and the sound—a crisp, snowy (clack)—reminded me of breaking a perfectly frozen icicle. In PvE, Overflow and Firing Line turned it into a reliable boss-phase assistant, though nobody stared at bosses through a sniper scope in 2023 unless they were role-playing. In Crucible, Keep Away and Opening Shot made it one of the most forgiving skill-gates I’ve ever wielded. Even in 2026, when everyone and their ghost uses The Supremacy or an Eye of Sol, I occasionally unsheathe my crafted Locutus for a nostalgia trip. It’s like wearing your dad’s old jacket—still warm, still stylish, just a little out of fashion.

3. The Eremite — The Solar Thumper with an Identity Crisis

High-impact fusion rifles are the slow-cooking stews of Destiny’s arsenal: they demand patience, but when they hit, you taste genuine power. The Eremite arrived like a chef who knew exactly what ingredients to combine but couldn’t decide if the dish was for a Crucible banquet or a PvE barbecue. In the left column, you could snag Lead from Gold or Envious Assassin for PvE, and then slap on Reservoir Burst, turning it into a mobile sunspot generator. For Crucible, Pulse Monitor and Offhand Strike let you hip-fire from ranges that had shotgun apes rethinking their life choices. The brand-new perk “High Ground” was added right around the time I kept hearing obi-wan memes—fitting, because having the high ground with a high-impact fusion turned me into a low-budget Anakin slayer. Not top of the meta, but a delightful surprise that aged like a fine wine, or at least a decent grape juice.

2. Kept Confidence — The Strand Symphony

Oh, Kept Confidence, my beloved kinetic sidekick. This was the first adaptive 140 rpm Hand Cannon to kiss the Strand element, and it sang like a punk-rock ballad. From the moment I masterworked mine, it felt like the gun and I had an unspoken pact: I’d feed it headshots, and it would feed me Threadling grenades. For PvE, Loose Change (the new perk back then) rewarded me for being slightly less accurate—like a forgiving teacher—while Harmony or Collective Action turned my Strand build into an unrelenting green hurricane. In Crucible, Killing Wind and Eye of the Storm made every duel feel like I was starring in my own spaghetti western. Three years later, I still see newer players asking, “What’s that hand cannon?” and I’ll proudly reply, “A relic of a simpler, witchier time.” It’s the gun equivalent of a cherished mixtape you discovered in a thrift store.

1. Brya’s Love — The Void Poet Laureate

And then we reach the apex predator of the Witch’s arsenal. Brya’s Love is a precision scout rifle that somehow, even in 2026, enjoys a cult following among high-end PvE enthusiasts. Back in Season of the Witch, the buffed Shoot to Loot turned it into a vacuum cleaner for Orbs of Power, making Devour Warlocks weep with joy. Pair that with Destabilizing Rounds, and you became a walking purple firework display, vaporizing entire battalions of Thrall before they knew what hit them. The perk pool was a buffet: Rapid Hit for the crisp-aim lovers, Perpetual Motion for restless wanderers, and Explosive Payload for those who enjoyed a little extra (boom) in their (pew). I’ve run dozens of Grandmaster Nightfalls with Brya’s Love, and each time it felt like I was painting a Void masterpiece on the battlefield. It’s the kind of weapon that makes you feel smarter than you actually are—like wearing glasses without a prescription.

So there you have it. Six weapons, born from a season of deception and Hive trickery, that we crafted, leveled, and eventually relegated to nostalgia. Yet in 2026, I can’t help but smile whenever I vault-dive and find my Kept Confidence or Brya’s Love waiting patiently, reminding me that even in an ever-evolving universe, a few good guns never truly go out of style. 😊